recycledJuice: Sole Wine

From a column I wrote that was likely read by fewer than ten people:

Sole Wine

As a kid I used to doodle incessantly.  I doodled all the usual things; airplanes, yellow suns and lollipop trees.  For some odd reason, I also doodled shoes.  I drew tennis shoes.  I drew basketball shoes.  I even drew cowboy boots.  I developed a hearty appetite for shoes.  Some might say this appetite teetered towards a footwear fetish.

When I entered high school, I played on the freshmen basketball team.  Actually, ‘played’ isn’t quite accurate.  I mostly sat on the team’s bench admiring my blindingly white shoes, which I only laced up for games.  Even though I was a second string player, I would have made the all-conference shoe team.  I collected five pairs of shoes during the brief, three-month basketball season.  At that point I was already waist deep in a lifelong shoe fetish.

I’ve had no trouble infusing my shoe fetish with my more recently developed wine fetish.  When I get a hankerin’ for shoes and wine, I pop open a bottle of wine from Italy’s heel, toe, shin or calf.  How does Italian wine satiate a shoe fetish?  It’s simple, actually.  Visualize the map of Italy.  Now morph this map into a boot.  In the world of wine, the upper reaches of this boot (i.e. Northern Italy) usually receive most of the attention.  In fact wine enthusiasts have often ignored or shunned the heel, toe, shin and, calf.  How sad.  From a shoe fetish standpoint, these are the most interesting parts of any proper boot.

Lucky for me, in recent years the nether regions of Italy’s boot have been taking the wine world by storm.  Allow me to be your guide on a brief tour of my favorite wines, readily available, from the calf, shin and heel of our Italian boot.

Le Marche (Marches) – the Calf

The calf has a graceful shape.  Of course when snugly covered by a boot, it becomes beautifully mysterious.  This is echoed by the white wine, Verdicchio dei Castelli di Jesi of Le Marche.  It is a light wine with soft aromas of green apple and flowers.  It’s perfectly suited in its role as an aperitif – a restrained appetizer before the unveiling of the main course.  Try Fazi Battaglia Verdicchio dei Castelli di Jesi ($9) or Fattoria Laola Verdicchio dei Castelli di Jesi ($12).  Ease yourself into the universe of footwear fetishes and fine wine with this bianco from Le Marche.

Campania – the Shin

Now the shin in and of itself isn’t terribly exciting.  Even the sleekest pair of black leather boots normally doesn’t ‘sex up’ the shin.  Yet isn’t it amazing what a little custom stitching can do for this otherwise bland area?  Campania is Italy’s shin.  And its capital, Naples, is the Italian Mecca for tailors.  Of course, a talented tailor can easily sex up anything wearable with a few well placed stitches.  The Campanian winery Terradora Dipaolo is most definitely sexing up Campania’s wine landscape.  It produces exciting wine from ancient, traditionally bland grapes.  Two of its shining and affordable examples are Irpinia Aglianico ($14) and Irpinia Falanghina ($14).  Aglianico is a red grape thought to have been brought to Campania by the ancient Greeks.  Terradora’s Aglianico is the color of black cherries.  It tickles the nose with spicy berry scents and coats the tongue with soft textures and a delightful finish.  In contrast, the Falanghina grape produces a straw colored white wine.  It offers an intense aroma of pears and pineapple followed by surprising mineral and ‘stony’ flavors.  Try these wines; don’t ignore the shin!

Apuglia (Puglia) – the Heel
As most shoe fetishists know, the heel is the undisputed champ of shoe sexiness.  For the new wave of Italian wine lovers, Apuglia, the region that comprises Italy’s heel, is fabulously fetish-worthy.  Two of my favorite wines from Apuglia are Primitivo and Salice Salentino.  Primitivo is a stiletto heel - bold, pungent, and spicy.  This wine is made from a grape of the same name, and it is genetically identical to the big, bold California Zinfandel grape. Here are two good examples of this wine:  A-mano Primitivo ($12) and Terrale Primitivo ($9).  Try Primitivo with a bowl of Spaghetti Bolognese.

Salice Salentino is the kitten heel of Apuglian wine.  It is understated, yet equally as sexy and tasty as Primitivo.  Salice Salentino is made from the Negroamaro grape, which translated, means ‘bitter black.’  However, Taurino Salice Salentino Reserva, 1999 ($13) is neither bitter nor black.  This brick-red wine is restrained, yet offers an enticing character of blackberries and a hint of licorice.  It is amazing with meals off the grill or almost anything roasted.  All hail the heel.

Perhaps you believe neither footwear nor feet nor the wines of boot-shaped countries are interesting.
Maybe your particular fetish doesn’t have anything to do with shoes.  Well, don’t give up on Italy just yet.  Take a look at a map.  Allow your gaze to wander upward; specifically to the posterior region just above the thigh.  Is this area, otherwise known as the Veneto, more to your liking?  If so, try this spicy little number: Maculan Pino & Toi ($13).  Now if you don’t like this wine or the location of this particular region, I give up.  You are officially fetish-less.  Cheers.

Comments

[thecaveman]

I was never a shoe guy myself but I do love Verdichio. The fazi is okay but for a couple of bucks more the Ronchi Casal di Serra is a bit richer (smaller rendements) and much more mineral, almost a quasi-chablis.

As for reds marches.. here's a review that I did for a super bomba of the Marches.. I don't particularily dig most big reds, but this one blew me away...http://thecaveman.blogspot.com/2005_02_01_thecaveman_archive.html you have to scroll down to cellar updates and the rosso piceno (damn blogfuckingspot).

Easy Beau, a good job like always.

[Beau]

Cool. I realize the Fazi isn't the best example, but it is about the only one I've got here. I did read your Rosso P. post and liked it. I've had a Rosso P. once before at Pizzeria Otto in NYC. I wish I would have written it down.

My 'caveman list' of wines is getting too long. I'll have to drive a truck cross country to round up the lot!

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